Twitter: LIVE

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Why be undecided when you can be on fire?

Hello citizens, as we are within the the final two weeks of the election, a recent survey suggests that 5-12% of the electorate are undecided voters. SO, in the event that you fall within that demographic today, I would like to take the opportunity to help you make up your mind. I don't know how familiar you are with the candidates at this point, but lets take a look at their backgrounds:

John McCain is 50 foot lumberjack wielding the ax of freedom in the plaid of justice. Barack Obama is a crime-fighting robot from the future (Robama) running for President to prevent the coming Diet-cola wars.

On the issues: In the Senate John McCain votes so hard the only way to describe it is “Bloodplosion”. Obama has voted for Cyclones over 9000 times. Obama is pro-eye lazers. McCain is anti-kitten. Both candidates support male-enhancement research.

Interesting Facts:

John McCain was shot down by taxes in the Vietnam war.

Barack Obama commands the woodland spirits with his Kenyan magics.

John McCain is old enough to have seen the muffin man.

Barack Obama emits enough electricity to power a small dance floor.


---
Hope That helped.

~ N.A.Z.

5 comments: